Uneasy Rider - The Charlie Daniels Band
I was takin a trip about L.A.
Toolin along in my cheverolet
Tokin on a number
and diggin on the radio
Just as I crossed the Mississippi line
I heard that highway start to whine
And I knew that left rear tire
was about to blow
Well the spare was flat
and I got uptight
Cause there wasn't a filling station in sight
So I just limped on down
the shoulder on the rim
I went as far as I could
and when I stopped the car
It was right in front of this little bar
Kind of a red-neck lookin joint
called the Dew Drop Inn
I stuffed my hair up under my hat
And told the bartender that I had a flat
And you would he be kind enough
to give me change for a one
There was one thing
I was sure proud to see
There wasn't a soul in the place
except for him and me
He just looked disgusted and pointed
toward the telephone
I called up the station down
the road a ways
He said he wasn't very busy today
And he could have somebody there
in just about 10 minutes or so
He said,
Now, you just stay right where yer at!
And I bother to tell the darn fool
That I sure as hell
didn't have anyplace else to go
I just ordered up a beer
and sat down at the bar
When some guy walked in
and said, Who owns this car
With the peace sign,
the mag wheels and the four on the floor?
He looked at me and I damn near died
And I decided that I'd just wait outside
So I laid a dollar on the bar
and headed for the door
Just when I wthought
I'd get outta there with my skin
These 3 big dudes come strollin in
With one old drunk chick
and some fella with green teeth
I was almost to the door
when the biggest one
Said, You tip your hat to this lady, son!
And when I did,
all that hair fell out from underneath
Now the last thing I wanted
was to get into a fight
In Jackson Mississippi
on a Saturday night
Especially when there was
three of them and only one of me
They all started laughin
and I felt kinda sick
And I knew I better think
of something pretty quick
So I just reached out and kicked
old green teeth right in the knee
Now he let out a yell
that'd curl yer hair
But before he could move
I grabbed me a chair
And said "Now watch him
Folks cause he's a thoroughly dangerous man
"You may not know it
but this man is a spy.
He's a undercover agent
for the FBI
And he's been sent down
here to infiltrate the Ku Klux Klan!"
He was still bent over
holdin on to his knee
But everybody else was
looking and listening to me
And I laid it on thicker
and heavier as I went
I said, "Would you believe this
man has gone as far
As tearing Wallace stickers
off the bumpers of cars.
And he voted for George
McGovern for President."
"Well, he's a friend of them long
haired, hippy-type, pinko fags!
I betchya he's even got a commie flag
tacked up on the wall inside his garage.
"He's a snake in the grass,
I tell ya guys.
He may look dumb
but that's just a disguise,
He's a mastermind in the
ways of espionage"
They all started lookin real
suspicious at him
And he jumped up and said
"Now just wait a minute Jim!
You know he's lying I been
living here all of my life!"
"I'm a faithful follower of
Brother John Birch
And I belong to the Antioch
Baptist Church.
And I ain't even got a garage,
you can call home and ask my wife!"
Then he started saying somethin
bout the way I was dressed
But I didn't wait around to hear the rest
I was too busy moving
and hoping I didn't run outta luck
When I hit the ground
I was making tracks
And they were just taking my
car down off the jacks
So I threw the man a twenty
and jumped in and fired
that mother up
Mario Andretti wouldda sure
been proud
Of the way I was movin
when I passed that crowd
Coming out the door and
headed toward me at a trot
And I guess I should of gone
ahead and run
But somehow I just couldn't
resist the fun
Of chasing them all just once
around the parking lot
Well they headed for their car,
but i hit the gas
And spun around and headed
them off at the pass
I was slinging gravel and putting
a ton of dust in the air
I had them all out there
steppin and fetchin
Like their heads was on fire
and their asses was catchin
then I figgered I had better go ahead
and split before the cops got there
When I hit the road I was really wheelin
Had gravel flyin and rubber squeelin
And I didn't slow down till
I was almost to Arkansas
I think I'm gonna reroute my trip
I wonder if anybody'd think I'd flipped
If I went to L.A., via Omaha
